How much of everything
These are working quantities for an evening dinner party with drinks - generous enough that you will not run out, not so generous that you are eating it all week.
| Item | Per person | For 6 | For 8 | For 10 |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Wine, over a whole evening | Half a bottle | 3 bottles | 4 bottles | 5 bottles |
| Sparkling, for arrival | One glass (6 per bottle) | 1 bottle | 1–2 bottles | 2 bottles |
| Soft drinks and water | 500ml | 3 litres | 4 litres | 5 litres |
| Meat or fish, boneless | 175–225g raw | 1.2–1.4kg | 1.5–1.8kg | 1.9–2.3kg |
| Potatoes or other starch | 200g raw | 1.2kg | 1.6kg | 2kg |
| Vegetables, total | 200g raw | 1.2kg | 1.6kg | 2kg |
| Bread | 60–75g | 1 large loaf | 1–2 loaves | 2 loaves |
| Cheese, as a course | 60–80g | 400g | 550g | 700g |
| Nibbles before dinner | 50g | 300g | 400g | 500g |
A countdown that works
The point of a countdown is not thoroughness. It is moving as much as possible off the day itself, because the failure mode of a dinner party is a host who spends the whole evening in the kitchen.
- Two to four weeks out: fix the guest list, send the invitation, ask about dietary requirements in the same message.
- One week out: decide the menu, and check it against every dietary answer you have received.
- Four or five days out: close RSVPs. Do not shop before this - a headcount change of two is a menu change.
- Two days out: do the big shop. Buy wine, soft drinks and ice now rather than on the day.
- The day before: anything that improves overnight - braises, dressings, desserts, stock. Lay the table. Clear the fridge.
- The morning: prep everything that can sit - peel, chop, marinate, portion. Chill the drinks.
- Two hours before: get yourself ready first, before the kitchen looks finished. It never looks finished.
- An hour before: nibbles out, ice in the bucket, one thing in the oven, music on.
Asking about dietary requirements
Ask when you invite, in the invitation itself, and ask an open question. “Any allergies?” gets you allergies and misses the vegetarian, the person avoiding alcohol, the one who cannot eat before nine because of medication and the guest who is too polite to volunteer coeliac disease.
The more useful question is what they do eat. It turns a list of prohibitions into something you can actually cook, and it gives a guest with a complicated situation an easy way to describe it.
Then design one main that everyone can eat, rather than a main plus a separate plate for one person. A guest handed a visibly different, lesser dish will remember that, and every vegetarian in the country has a story about a plate of plain vegetables.
Before I plan the food - is there anything you don’t eat, or anything I should know? Allergies, vegetarian, avoiding alcohol, anything at all. Tell me what you do like eating too, it genuinely helps.
The timings that ruin dinner parties
- Three hot things at once. Domestic ovens fit one thing well. Plan a cold or room-temperature starter and a dessert made the day before.
- The 45-minute gap. Guests arrive at 7.30 for food at 8.15, with nothing to eat. Put something out the moment the first person arrives.
- Serving too late. Aim to sit down within an hour of the stated time. People arrive hungry, drink on an empty stomach and the evening ages badly.
- A menu you have never cooked. A dinner party is the wrong place to debut a recipe. Cook a thing you have made before, well.
- No plan for the washing up. Decide in advance that it waits until tomorrow, and then genuinely leave it.
- The host who never sits down. If you are not at the table, your guests are at a restaurant with a nervous waiter.
Messages you can copy
Dinner at ours on Saturday the 12th - 7.30pm for 8, and expect to be there until late. Just bring yourself. Before I plan the food, is there anything you don’t eat or anything I should know? Could you let me know by Tuesday so I can shop properly?
Looking forward to tomorrow. Doors at 7.30, we’ll eat around 8.15. We’re at [address] - buzzer’s the second one. Parking is fine on the road after 6.30. Nearest station is a ten-minute walk. Don’t bring anything, genuinely, it’s all done.
Thank you for last night - it was a very good one. Photos are here if you took any: [link]. And the total for the wine came to £62 across the six of us, so that’s £10.35 each whenever suits.
The day after
Keeping all of that on the event rather than scattered between a chat, a notes app and a bank statement is the difference between hosting getting easier each time and starting from nothing every time. Status Social keeps the invitation, the guest list, the costs and the photos in one place, so the next dinner starts from the last one.
- Say thank you and open the photo album while the evening is still fresh.
- Add any shared costs and settle them the same day rather than the following week.
- Write down what you cooked and how much was left. This is the single most useful note you will keep.
- Note who got on with whom and who you would invite together again.